Pope Benedict speaks out against homosexuality and ‘Gender Theory’

Pope Benedict XVI says saving humanity from homosexual or transsexual behaviour is just as important as saving the rainforest from destruction.

The pope used his traditional end-of-year speech to say a few words about what he considers the important issues of the day. In a world where the practices of greedy bankers and corrupt financiers have forced the global economy into recession, and the insane policies of evil African dictator Robert Mugabe have caused the outbreak of a cholera epidemic and driven his own people to the brink of starvation, the 81 year old pontiff felt an attack on homosexuality and transgenderism was the best way to make use of his end-of-year address to senior Vatican staff.

Pope Benedict looks askance at gays and transsexuals

At a time when a record number of homes even in more affluent countries are being re-possessed and many people find themselves unemployed and facing an uncertain future, the pope emphasised his total rejection of ‘Gender Theory’. While people are facing starvation, disease and genocide in the failed states of Africa – Zimbabwe, the Sudan and Somalia, to name but three of the worst – the 81 year old ex-member of the Hitler Youth showed where his priorities lie by saying that homosexuality and ‘Gender Theory’ are as big a threat to humanity as environmental challenges such as the destruction of rainforests.

 

Zimbabwe President Robert Mugabe raises his fist against the decadent West

Pope Benedict XVI explained that defending God’s creation was not limited to saving the environment, but also protecting man from self-destruction.

The pope warned that ‘Gender Theory’ blurs the distinction between male and female and could thus lead to the “self-destruction” of the human race.

Gender theory

Gender theory explores sexual orientation, the roles assigned by society to individuals according to their gender, and how people perceive their biological identity.

Gay and transsexual groups, particularly in the United States, promote it as a key to understanding and tolerance, but the pope disagrees.

It is not “outmoded metaphysics” to urge respect for the “nature of the human being as man and woman,” he told scores of prelates gathered in the Vatican’s sumptuous Clementine Hall.

The Catholic Church opposes gay marriage. It teaches that while homosexuality is not sinful, homosexual acts are.

In 2005 (his first year in office), Pope Benedict XVI upheld a ban on men with “deep-seated homosexual tendencies” becoming priests, and also described homosexuality as a “tendency” towards an “intrinsic moral evil”.

The former Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger was head of the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith – once known as the Holy Office of the Inquisition – from 1981 until his election. His defence of church doctrine led to him to be called “the Pope’s enforcer” and “God’s rottweiler”.

Joseph Ratzinger was elected to the papacy in April 2005. At the age of 78, he was the oldest cardinal to become Pope since Clement XII was elected in 1730. Joseph Ratzinger was born into a traditional Bavarian farming family in 1927, although his father was a policeman. At the age of 14, he joined the Hitler Youth and was briefly held as a prisoner of war by the Allies in 1945.

Could there be another reason why the pope has used his end-of-year address to speak out against homosexuality and transsexuality? Perhaps he hopes that the traditionalist, ant-gay wing of the Church of England will depart from the Anglican Communion and re-join the Catholic Church.

It cannot have escaped the elderly pontiff’s notice that in July 2008 the Archbishop of the Episcopal Church of the Sudan declared that Gene Robinson, the openly gay Bishop of New Hampshire, “should resign for the sake of the church.”

In a press conference at the decennial Lambeth Conference, the Most Rev. Dr. Daniel Deng Bul said that homosexual ordination “is not what is found in the Bible” and that it is “not the norm of the Anglican world.”

Archbishop Bul, who serves as Bishop of Juba as well as primate of the church in Sudan, represents some of the most persecuted Christian minorities in the world, and lives in the country where Mrs. Gillian Gibbons was last year accused of insulting Islam. She was arrested, tried, and sentenced to 15 days in a Khartoum jail.

What had she done? Sheffield-born Mrs. Gibbons, mother of two, primary school teacher – and clearly a danger to the Sudanese state and to the whole Islamic religion – had allowed the seven-year-olds in her class at the Unity High School, Khartoum, to name their teddy bear Mohammed!

Did the pope speak out when the Sudanese government of President Omar Hasan Ahmad al-Bashir persecuted a harmless, 54-year-old English primary school teacher? Did he denounce this ludicrous, outrageous act of bullying? No, he did not – even though he is no lover of Islam. In 2006, in a controversial papal speech, the Pope quoted a 14th century Byzantine emperor who said the Prophet Muhammad had brought the world only “evil and inhuman” things. This provoked intense anger in the Muslim world. He recently generated more anger among some Muslims by personally baptising a prominent Muslim convert, Magdi Allam, who has been an outspoken critic of Islamist militancy and a strong supporter of Israel.

Harmony Transgender Social Weekend – 2

Harmony Transgender Social Weekend – 1

My Likes and Dislikes

I like…

I like Barak Obama (so far); David Davies (a courageous Tory who believes in standing up for our fundamental democratic freedoms unlike the despicable Blair gov’t); I like Agnostics; Atheists; Buddhists; Earth-Goddess Worshippers; Feminists; Goths; Jewish intellectuals; Lesbians & Gay men; Gregorian Chants; Optimists; Pacifists; Pagans; Poets; Secular Liberal Humanists (probably am one); Socialists; She-Males; Shamans; TV/CDs; T-Girls; Transsexuals; Wiccans; Wombats; Women by birth or choice; any folk who value and worship the Divine and Earthly Feminine in all its manifestations and psychological, social and gender characteristics; I like any cruiser motorbikes, esp. Yamaha Viragos and Harley-Davidsons; I like drinking (esp. scotch whisky & real ale); gothdom; free speech; talking about gender, transgender, life, religion, the universe and everything…

I don’t like…

Political correctness, religious fundamentalism, war-mongering neo-conservatives, god-bothering redneck creationists,  Alan Carr, Janet Street-Porter, Sandi Toksvig (who has ruined my enjoyment of BBC Radio 4’s ‘The News Quiz’); Calvinists, bigots of all types, including the Pope; and especially I don’t like self-righteous hypocrites and self-serving politicians and rich lawyers who line their own pockets and do favours for their cronies – for example Tony & Cherie Blair, two of the most loathsome individuals on the planet.

Gender identity and the three great monotheistic (Abrahamic) religions

So do I consider myself a ‘woman’ or a ‘man’?  And what does religion say about gender identity?

When I am dressed as a woman, I see myself as a woman.  Obviously I don’t view myself as a woman all the time, but my desire to function socially and be accepted as a woman most of the time is getting stronger, and I recognise that.  I haven’t indicated whether or not I see myself ever living as a woman full time. Maybe I do, maybe I don’t.  (I can tell you that even if I had SRS, I would probably occasionally dress as a boy just to be contrary – because I’m like that!)

I guess I want the best of both worlds, and I actually can’t see why that is impossible.  Perhaps that’s naive, but there you go.  Too much Monty Python in my youth, probably.

I don’t like being designated as a ‘CD/TV’ any more as that’s not how I see myself, and I think those expressions are very limiting.

I am also suspicious of the whole way that transgendered people are ‘diagnosed’ by the medico-psychological professions who believe themselves to be the experts on transgenderism.  I think our understanding of TGism is about at the stage that the barber-surgeons of the 18th century were at as regards conventional medicine, if I can make that analogy.

In other words, the so-called experts may well be wrong; their ‘treatments’ as regards SRS etc. may also be wrong, at least for some people.  Certainly that great early pioneer of how to ‘treat’ transgendered people medically, Dr. Harry Benjamin, has been proved to have been misguided in some instances.  The famous case of the male twins who were circumcised is an example of this – something went wrong, and one twin had his penis accidentally cut off by the rabbi – Dr. Benjamin then decided he should be raised as a girl, with disastrous consequences for the individual concerned, who as an adult chose to revert to the male gender.

SRS may not be the inevitable end point for all transgendered people – be they transsexuals or not – and I am not sure even whether the term ‘transsexual’ is any more helpful than ‘transvestite’ or ‘crossdresser’.

Transsexuals are cross-dressers or transvestites, at least while they are pre-operative, as the terms ‘cross-dresser’ and ‘transvestite’ are properly merely nouns denoting a neutral description of behaviour.  The term ‘transgendered’ on the other hand recognises the distinction between gender, a social and psychological construct, and biological sex, which is a physiological reality.

I don’t see gender identity as an ‘either/or’ – I think ‘man’ and ‘woman’ and ‘masculine’ and ‘feminine’ are simplistic psycho-social constructs over emphasized by the three great monotheistic or Abrahamic religions, as a means of reinforcing prejudice and justifying the control of one biological sex over the other.  As an agnostic humanist, I don’t care for any of the fundamentalist manifestations of Islam, Christianity or Judaism.

Some societies and cultures have never fully subscribed to the bi-polar notion of sex and gender, and have room for a ‘third sex’ – North American Indians recognise the ’squaw man’ as a valued member of their community; in Thai culture there are the Kathoi or ‘Ladyboys’; and more recently in our western society being a ’she-male’ seems to be growing in acceptability and popularity as a social gender role option.

On the subject of Ladyboys, we saw a wonderful cabaret of ‘The Ladyboys of Bankok’ which fortuitously visited my home town of Chesterfield (Derbyshire, UK) last week, so we were privileged to enjoy the performances of some of the most beautiful ‘transvestites’ in the world.

The brochure we bought before the show about the Ladyboy cabaret described them as ‘tranvestites’ and referred to them as ‘Mr – ‘ but I would guess this was for the benefit of the general public, who may not have come across Ladyboys before.  The female pronouns ’she’ and ‘her’ would inevitably be used within the troupe (I would guess) to denote the Ladyboy members, as there were also four distinctly male members of the group.

The Ladyboys had well-formed breasts, wide hips, narrow waists, very slim builds and very beautiful feminine faces.  They looked much more like women than many self-identifying ‘transsexuals’ I have met.

To me and probably the rest of the audience they looked like lovely women – but yes, I understand they still also had their male parts down below.  Some would probably see the Ladyboys as ‘transvestites’, but I saw them as very feminine and beautiful women.

What, exactly, is a ‘woman’? Now there’s a question! (See Simone de Beauvoir’s ‘Second Sex’ and the Feminist writings of the 1960’s and 70’s.)

If we have to use limiting gender designations, Ladyboys could best be described as ‘TG girls’ or ‘transgendered women’ – I can’t see them as ‘transvestites’ – they are much more than that in their full social gender identity as women.

What makes a ‘woman’ or a ‘man’?  I think it has very little to do with what you have between your legs, but everything to do with how you feel inside, how you express your personal psychological ‘gender’ attributes socially, and perhaps more important than anything – how others view you.

So in my book it is perfectly possible to be a ‘woman’ with a penis, or a ‘man’ with a vagina – and there are plenty of examples.

I appreciate that I am probably challenging some entrenched views among the TG community as well as ’straight’ society – but there you go – if we don’t challenge these stereotypes and definitions, we are never going to progress as a species beyond them.

To  be governed in one’s behaviour by conventional male/female/masculine/feminine stereotypes is very limiting and it is a shame that so many so-called ‘normal’ or ’straight’ people are so controlled in how they are able to express themselves gender-wise.

I see no point in giving up one straight-jacketing stereotype (as a conventional ‘man’) simply to don another, as a conventional ‘woman’.)

I am transgendered – yes, but I refuse the designation ‘transvestite’ or ‘cross-dresser’, and I am  not ready to take on and adopt the term ‘transsexual’ to describe myself.

I rejoice in my transgenderism, I regard it as a gift, and I wouldn’t be any other way, unless it was to have been born a biological (genetic XX chromosome) female.  I guess that would have been my first choice – but being a TG girl isn’t too bad as a second choice.  I would hate to be a ’straight’ male – it must be ghastly.

To sum up, I would suggest there is much more to gender identity than that which is believed by conventional society – and the transgender community is itself a work in progress and shouldn’t be circumscribed by these conventional definitions.

As we find out more about ourselves as trangendered people, we can educate society as a whole – and ourselves – but it would be a pity if we were constrained by the traditional views of what constitutes a ‘woman’ or a ‘man’ .

The current prevailing orthodoxy, originating, as I have suggested above, from the bigoted, repressive, misogynistic and patriarchal views promulgated by the Abrahamic religions, does not have to be the last word on the subject.

So there you go.  I can’t seem to leave this subject alone. Oh dear!

Recent photo of Rosie and Katie

Spironolactone, estradiol, feminising hormones, female versus male orgasm

I think taking Spiro (at the 100 – 200 mg per day level) did stop me having erections; it was several years ago when I took them, and it was only for a period of about six months.  It might also have been something else that affected me that way.

My wife enjoys having sex with me when I am performing as a male; it wasn’t much fun for her when I couldn’t do the business, but everything seems okay in that respect now, in spite of the (relatively low) 2 mg daily dosage of estradiol I am taking.  As far as that goes, it doesn’t seem to be true in my case that taking female hormones stops me getting an erection, although as Lucy (a friend on TrannyWeb) says, it might do eventually (in which case, we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it).

On the other hand might not this be a sort of myth – an urban legend among the transgender community?  Whether one can or cannot still perform sexually as a male, whether one would want to anyway, and how long one can still do it for if taking female hormones all seem to be issues which cause some of us more concern than others.

 I have heard some people reporting that taking female hormones does not interfere (much) with sexual potency as a male – and what about the she-male phenomenon?  Others say it definitely kills Lord John stone dead, and good job too.  It seems that yet others are able develop female breasts but still be able to function as a male sexually more or less indefinitely – is there a discussion string on TrannyWeb or any other TG forums on this (if so, I haven’t found it yet).

Obviously if I take female hormones, at whatever dosage, for long enough, I am going to get to the point of no return as regards having boobs, even if I stop the hormones.  I think I am probably approaching that point fairly soon.  But this doesn’t worry me – I guess I am that far gone already in my transgender journey – neither does it worry my wife, who is delighted with my female breasts.

I am happy as I am -  and in doing what I am doing as regards the hormones, and don’t see why I have to say either ‘yes, I am transitioning towards SRS’ or ‘no, I am not.’  Let’s wait and see. The only important thing is to make sure that what I am doing regarding taking feminising hormones is done in the safest way possible;and my G.P. knows about it now and I absolutely take on board what Lucy said above taking the lowest dose possible of Progynova or Estrofem, whilst still getting the feminising effect that I desire (and I realise that I desire it very strongly – so maybe I am transsexual). I am getting the breast growth and feminising effect that I want on 2 mg per day, and I do not need to take Spiro, so I’m not.  I am following Lucy’s advice on this.

 I don’t think my wife would mind me saying that she has discovered that she has lesbian tendencies and she also has quite a strong masculine side which she likes to express in various ways (eventually she will probbly read this posting and she will probably hit me..!)

A couple of further things I will say – I very recently (at the Harmony Weekend) met a ‘professional’ transsexual who seemed personally affronted that I was taking female hormones but did not necessarily self-identify as a transsexual myself and was not seeing a National Health shrink or counsellor, like she is.

I am also a little puzzled that some TS’s say that taking Spiro to make them impotent as a male is actually a desirable outcome for them.  I have come across this view before.  For me it would be neither desirable nor undesirable, but an inevitable biological outcome of switching my endocrine balance. 

If I had SRS and could be guaranteed that I would be able to function fully in a sexual sense as a female, including experiencing multiple full female orgasms (I wish!) – I might be more inclined to say I’d go for the full transition (that may still happen at some point in the future, okay, I can’t rule it out.)

It seems to me that women experience a far more rewarding and complete orgasm than men – the lucky things –  wow, would I like to experience what they experience, and have the full body sensations and internal glow going on for that long!

We poor creatures that were born with the old gentleman between the legs can have a long build-up, but for me at least, the actual moment of male orgasm only lasts a few seconds (unless I keep holding back on the point of orgasm, which is excruciating, and I’m  not sure it’s exactly a pleasure); and then it’s all over and within a few seconds you are thinking about something else entirely (like eating, smoking (although I don’t smoke now), watching TV or listening to the World Service of the BBC on the radio, while you female partner is all aglow for a long, long time…and usually she falls asleep eventually…still in a state of bliss…

 I may as well hang on to the old wedding tackle until it becomes useless or we decide (both my wife and I, as I would never do it without her permission and support), that I’m going for the full SRS, as at least I still get some pleasure from the sexual act as a male, and no one can guarantee me that if I get an ‘innie’ rather than an ‘outie’.  (I know the theory of the SRS op. about using the sensitive skin at the tip of the penis and from the stem to create the clitoris and sensitive areas of the labia, and I know some post-operative TS’s claim to be able to experience female orgasms while others are still waiting for their clits to ‘wake up’ years after the op. – so it still seems a bit of a lottery.)

I am also quite clear that SRS would be the last step in my transition – there are far more important factors in how well we TG girls can ‘pass’ as a woman when we are out and about than what’s between your legs, such as hair styling, female voice and feminine facial characteristics. Some TS’s will no doubt say I’m missing the point, because it’s all about what you’ve got between your legs – well, that’s a view, certainly.  

But one of the tragedies of early gender reassignment surgery on the NHS (and privately) is the number of post-operative TS’s who have to live with having very maculine faces and voices, can’t pass as women in normal life and society, feel like freaks, and are therefore very unhappy and regret their surgery.  Some of them may well now be getting FFS and female voice coaching under the NHS – I think this is becoming more common.  But I do believe it is possible (and many she-males prove it) to function perfectly well in the female gender role socially while still having the male parts between the legs.  And some may well prefer to function sexually in this way, whether with women or with men as partners. Surely that is a personal choice?

I am doing what I can about what I consider are the three most important gender identity cues, which people on the street use to decide what you are – woman or man – and those are H., F. and V. – Hair, Face and Voice.  

I am having laser hair removal sessions to get rid of my facial hair, taking finasteride to promote scalp hair growth (although I am fortunate in having quite a good head of hair already, and no obvious signs of male-pattern balding); and trying my best to develop a female voice.  I think this takes about two years.

If I had the money to pay for any feminisation surgery, I would go first for FFS (facial feminisation surgery), which was the subject of my first posting and the starting point of this whole blog) – long before I went for SRS, as this would have a much more immediate beneficial effect on the ease with which I can pass.

 This is one of the great insights (almost an epiphany moment) I have gained recently from looking at all the transgender channels on YouTube (see my own YouTube channel for links to some of the best vids about developing a female voice and the best surgeons for facial feminisation surgery: http://uk.youtube.com/user/ambergoth)

Facial feminisation surgery did not really exist 10 or 15 years ago, any more than it was possible to self-medicate and buy hormones from the Internet.  These recent developments have given TG girls many more options than previously to be in control of their transitioning and to prioritise what is most important to them, rather than relying on NHS endocrinologists, psychiatrists, counsellors and NHS gender identity dysphoria clinics to make all the decisions for them. 

Yes, I’ve read all the warnings about self-medication and last weekend had to suffer the patronising remarks and controlling behaviour of a pre-operative TS who was following the NHS route.  She appeared to have had little positive benefit in terms of feminisation from the drug regime she was on, and she unfortunately had very masculine facial features and made the most elementary mistakes in her attempts to ‘pass’, such as walking like a man, talking like a man, and wearing a disastrous hair piece which displayed her male hairline at the back and side of her head.  (And I know I sound like a bitch, but you didn’t have to respond to all her assumptions about ‘what you have to do to be a good transsexual’ and answer the personal and intrusive questions she was firing off at my wife and I. This is why I made the remark about ‘professional’  transsexuals on my last blog upload, see below ).

Anyway, that’s it for now.

 

Gender Identity as a continuum, terms ‘Transvesite’, Crossdresser’, ‘Transgender’, ‘Transsexual’, where I am now, etc.

As regards my prostate, (with which I was having problems), I got the result of the PSA test today – it was normal – so I’m quite pleased about that, even though I know the PSA prostate test can be unreliable.  I am still going to see a urologist (my G.P. referred me) re. the prostate, just to make sure I have nothing to worry about, as I do seem to suffer from many of the symptoms of BHP (Benign Prostate Hyperplasia). 

Regarding taking 1mg of Finasteride to promote my scalp hair growth, this is more from vanity than necessity.  I am lucky in that I probably don’t have much to worry about.  I will upload next a very recent photo of myself and Rose-Marie (my wife) taken l at Martine Rose’s ‘Harmony Weekend’ at Matlock Bath  – which should be appearing as my avatar and photo on TrannyWeb once it has been approved by the moderator.  I already have shoulder length blonde hair and therefore don’t have much to complain about, but I am conscious of a very marginal thinning right at the front of the crown, which I’m hoping that the Finasteride might improve after about a year – but if it doesn’t do anything, it doesn’t really matter that much. 

I am still working out which is the best ‘ femme’ hair style for myself, bearing in mind my age and personal preferences.  The current very straight styles maybe don’t work for me, as my hair is naturally curly, and although I can get it to go straight (at least the hairdresser can), I think a few soft curls or ‘bangs’ as they say in the States, works better in softening and framing my face (god, I am going on…sorry!)

Regarding why I am trying to feminising my body, please excuse the length of my reply, but I need to ramble on at some length also about this, and it might be helpful to others in a similar situation.  

Yes, I guess I am transitioning, or to put it another way – as my wife says – I am a ‘work in progress(!)’ …but from what and to what is perhaps at this stage still open to question. My current designation on TrannyWeb as a ‘TV/Crossdresser’ doesn’t really describe where I am at nowadays. I would prefer ‘transgendered’.

I prefer to think of gender as a very broad continuum.  Some people start at one point (eg. hetero TV) and stay on that point all their lives; others may start at one point and ‘get off’ at another point – which is probably what is happening to me, and I am sure I am not the first.

I have thought about this a lot over many years.  In the late 1980’s I did a Masters degree dissertation on ‘Gender Identity Development’ – and very much believed in ‘nurture’ rather than ‘nature’ explanations of gender identity, which partly came out of 60’s Feminism, Simone De Beauvoir’s ‘The Second Sex’, and the idea that women and men are ‘made’ (by upbringing, society, etc.) rather than being born.

I am gradually trying to explain here my own development re. theories of transgenderism and gender identity in the context of developing psychological, psycho-sexual and societal theories of gender identity development and the views, explanations and distinctions that were advanced by transgender social groups such as the Beaumont Society and Northern Concord (a Manchester-based TG group), over the last 30 years or so.  Quite a job I have set myself!

I am not sure I am any longer convinced about the ‘hard and fast’ designations or self-identifications of TG girls as either‘ TV/crossdresser’ or ’transsexual’. And in saying this I know I am posing a threat to some people’s confort zones, and will probably bring down the wrath of both the  ‘professional’, ‘wear it on my sleeve’  transsexuals – and ‘hetero TV’s’, who believe themselves to be ‘just a bloke in a frock…but I’m not in the least bit effeminate..’, who make a big thing about distinguishing themselves from transsexuals, so as not to frighten the horses, wives and partners, etc.

If we have to use the ‘TV/crossdresser’ versus ‘transsexual’ distinction – and see these as mutually exclusive rather than different points on the same ’spectrum’ – I guess some people would say it sounds as if I am moving more towards the latter designation, in that I am taking female hormones and feminising my body, etc.  But I still prefer to use the expression ‘transgendered’ in describing where I am myself, as this seems to me to be an embracing and inclusive term, whereas ‘TV/crossdresser’ and ‘transsexual’ are arguably limiting and more ‘exclusive’ – though I don’t have a problem at all with folk who prefer to self-identify by using either one or the other term, and for many these are probably the best designations.

I prefer ‘transgendered’, in that it can be taken to include everyone who dresses as the so-called ‘opposite’ sex (a term in itself with which I disagree) -  my understanding of the term ‘transgendered’ (which may be wrong), is that it can include transvestites/crossdressers;  transsexuals;  she-males;  drag queens;  drag kings – regardless of sexual orientation, so you can be ‘straight’ ( hetero), bi, lesbian, gay, or whatever, but we are ALL transgendered if we sometimes or all the time like to dress in the clothing normally associated with the other biological (genetic) sex…and if some of us do something about changing our bodies as well. Phew!  Glad I got that off my chest!

 I thought and believed originally, back in the 1970’s – when I first ‘came out’ – that I was a ‘heterosexual TV’.  When I joined the Beaumont Society in the 1970’s, I had to say what I thought I was, and this was the nearest designation that described me at that time.  

The closest I could come now to an accurate designation of myself is that I am a ‘she-male’ and ‘lesbian’.  If I transitioned the whole way, I think I would be lesbian.

My wife and I have been discussing all this recently.  She knew about my cross-dressing before we got married, as I made a point of telling her.  She was under the impression (and so was I) that she was marrying a hetero tranny, which she was quite happy about.

We are still happily married (after 31 years), and Rosie loves my female side and in fact used to get cross with me if I didn’t get a skirt on often enough. That hasn’t been a problem lately, as these days I seem to be Katie more often than I am my male self (poor dolt that he is).  

And yes, I am taking female hormones, and my wife rejoices in my growing breasts and very much enjoys touching and fondling them!  Aren’t I lucky?!  But she also enjoys making love to a male as regards the ‘down-below’ department, and would miss this if I have SRS (sex-reassignment surgery – ie. getting an ‘innie’ rather than an ‘outie’).  We both recognise that this is no longer a total no-no and impossibility in the future;  it is acknowledged and open for discussion between us, including the consequences for our sex life. (We both laugh about ending up as two old ladies.)

I guess if that happens we might rub along together as a lesbian couple.  Likewise if my feminising hormone regime, or for that matter, any treatment for prostate problems meant that I could no longer get an erection, we would deal with that in a similar way.  Or Rosie joshes me that she might just go off and find a toy boy – and I guess she might, who knows!  (I hope not – but I would hardly be in a position to object.)

I am certainly still at present heterosexual, in a male sense, so being lesbian as a female might be on the cards if I transition the whole way – but again I say, who knows?  Perhaps I’ll go and find a toy boy as well.  There was certainly a very nice young man – looked a bit like a public school type, with a floppy quiff, waiting on us two ladies for afternoon tea in the restaurant at Chatsworth House yesterday (nice young man, nice young man…) Maybe sexual orientation, as well as gender identity is also a ‘moveable feast’, or perhaps we are all basically bisexual (…discuss).  Am I hetero as a male, am I hetero as a female, am I lesbian, am I bi – who knows?  Who the fuck cares?  Ain’t life interesting?!  We should embrace all the possibilities, as regards finding out what we are gender-wise, sexual orientation-wise, life, the universe and everything-wise… Is there a god?  I don’t think so, but I can’t prove it, and neither can you prove there is a god, if you are god-botherer…  But I digress…

I think I’ll stop for today at that point…!

 

Rose’s Harmony Weekend at the New Bath Hotel, Matlock Bath, Derbyshire, U.K.

What a great weekend!  Just get back from it.

One of the highlights for me was Sunday’s visit and tour round Chatsworth House, Derbyshire, a very famous English stately home and ancestral seat of the Dukes of Devonshire (see the recent Hollywood film – ‘The Duchess’, starring Keirs Knightly  (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0864761/) - about the life of Georgiana Cavendish, Duchess of Devonshire (June 7, 1757–March 30, 1806)

Chatsworth House was used at the set for many of the scenes of the film.  

A group of us transgendered girls from Rose’s Harmony Weekend went round the house to see the beautiful Christmas decorations, bringing a touch of colour and feminine charm to the other visitors on an otherwise cold and wet winter’s day!

Rosie and I greatly enjoyed chatting to some of you on Friday and Saturday night – we were nattering with Carol from London in the bar until after 3.00 am, and enjoyed our walk round the Sculpure Park at Chatsworth with Carol.  

It was nice to meet Lesley from Tyne & Wear, and the girls from Coventry, Yasmin & Sandy (also with goth tendencies!); and Susan, Amanda; Tiffany from Scotland – your costumes were amazing! Loved the maid’s uniform and the Alice in Wonderland outfit at Chatsworth – got a good photo of you on the stairs.

It was me who was making the video on Saturdat night, but please be assured that I am not going to put any video footage on YouTube of anyone (esp. wives and partners) who don’t want to be included.  I’ll get together with Martine and see if there is some way we can use some edited highlights of Miss Rose 2008 with the permission of everyone involved – but without any panning shots – so only the contestants appear.

Or maybe I could put something together on a DVD just for release to Rose’s members who went to the Harmony Weekend?  I’d welcome your views.

I did get also get some nice still shots at Chatsworth and at the discos – I’d like to put these into a short YouTube presentation, but it will mainly be featuring Tiffany, Nina, Matine, my own Rose-Marie, and one or two people – like Susan – with whom we were sitting at the evening meals.  Could I do this – and if anyone wants there photo removed – of course I’ll take it out.  My YouTube Channel is specifically a transgender channel, and no one is likely to be looking at it who is not either transgendered themselves or interested in transgendered folk.  For those of you who are not familiar with YouTube, it really is a wonderful facility on the Internet – so do resereve judgement until you have had a look: http://uk.youtube.com/user/ambergoth

Amber as a baby girl

 

Amber dressed in a girl's bathing costume and girl's blouse